Yesterday brought the arrival of the first of the spring gardening catalogs. Therefore, I spent the afternoon, evening, and most of the night organizing and inventorying my seed collection and contemplating this year’s vegetable garden.

The last few years, my goal had been to create enough of a few vegetables to put some back for winter eating. Thanks to the worst and longest drought in Texas history, I have failed to achieve this goal. I am not at all certain this drought is done with us yet, so this year, my gardening goal will be a little different.

This year, I will plant a larger variety of vegetable in smaller quantities. My goal is merely to supply my kitchen with tasty fresh veggies for as long as the season lasts. I’ve successfully managed to do this every year since I started gardening, so all I am really doing is releasing myself from the stress of trying to stockpile food and the disappointed that comes when that doesn’t happen. I love gardening, and I want to continue to love gardening.

Years ago when we started our mission to eat as locally, organically, and ethically as possible, sources for such foodstuffs were few and far between. Working toward stockpiling things grown in my own garden was a worthy goal. But now, there are so many places I can go all year ’round to buy healthy, in season, local produce at reasonable prices. Also, our financial situation has improved slightly, so if I want to buy organic produce, and it costs a little more than the non-organic options, I can without feeling like I’m breaking the bank.

I know that someday, our very own backyard will be capable of producing much of our dietary needs, but until such time as the weather cooperates with me, it seems silly to keep being so ambitious. Last year was awful. There has never been a more awful summer in my life. The extreme heat, the lack of rain, the fires (and constant threat of fire). The day I finally realized there was no hope for my garden was a sad, sad day. It was supposed to have been my best year yet, and it turned into the worst. The experience of working so hard for so little return almost killed my desire to garden at all.

But then the first gardening catalogs arrived, and apparently, I am still addicted to gardening. I just need to change gears. Less focus of production output … more focus on fun and relaxation! I’m looking forward to this year’s garden. Who knows what the weather will be like. Maybe better. Maybe the same. It could even get worse (though I shudder to imagine worse). I’m just going to do the best I can to get something for my work, but mostly, I’ll be doing the best I can to enjoy myself and my garden and spending time outside doing something interesting and heathy.

Let the garden planning begin!