It’s funny story time!
Last night, I was lounging in my recliner playing FFXIV, without my glasses on. If I’m doing something mind boggling repetitive in a game (ex: leveling up crafting), seeing it 100% clearly isn’t necessary. When I decided I wanted to go kill some things, I grabbed my glasses and put them on. Everything looked wrong, and I got instant vertigo. I mean, it was like they weren’t my glasses at all! I took them off, laid them on the side table, and proceeded to kill slightly blurry wolves for a few minutes. A little while later, having completely forgotten the first experience, I absentmindedly put them on again. The same thing happened. WTF!!! I immediately removed them again.
While killing a few more slightly blurry wolves, I mentally ran through all the health problems that might cause a severe and immediate change in vision. I didn’t even need to consult Dr. Google, because I’d looked it up before. The list is pretty short, and none of them are good (though a couple are not actually life threatening). You know, stuff like strokes, brain tumors, and so on. I discounted all but a migraine, though that would be an unusual migraine symptom for me. Also, I can’t recall the last migraine I had, because I just don’t really get them anymore. Therefore, I chalked it up to my eyes being tired from too much reading this week, because I do know from experience that too much reading does change my distance vision pretty dramatically. Usually not THAT dramatically, but yeah, maybe that was it. I really have been doing A LOT of reading.
A little while after that, I needed to read something on the screen, which is something I can’t comfortably do without my glasses. So I grabbed them and put them on. Surely, they’ll work this time, right? Same damn thing! Like the prescription was just completely wrong. I closed my right eye, and everything seemed fine. I closed my left eye, and HOLY HELL WHAT’S WRONG WITH MY RIGHT EYE!!! I prepared to consult Dr. Google, and began to feel just a little bit anxious. I removed my glasses so I could put on my reading glasses (yes, I still refuse to get bifocals), and as I placed them on the side table, this time something different happened. My fingers went through the area where there should be a lens! Yes, the right lens was missing!
Earlier in the day, my glasses had been on the left arm of the recliner, where I like them to be, and a certain large cat had launched himself up to the back of the chair off that arm, very nearly flinging glasses onto the floor. I was pretty sure that was when the lens went missing. So I searched the floor and surrounding environs. No lens. Therefore, I searched the deep inner recesses of the recliner. Lo and behold, my lens was found and popped back into place. I can see! I can see clearly! Well, I guess it wasn’t a stroke or brain tumor. Phew! Just an overweight cat determined to keep me from having nice things, like corrected vision.